Just a few words...

As many of you know, especially those of you who have taken time to read my "personal" page, I am not the type to preach and get on a soap box about religion/GOD or any of that other stuff. But lately, I have had a bit more of a desire to share with others some of my thoughts about the matter. So... now I think I will share with you some of my thoughts and a little more about me.

I am first and foremost a Christian. I believe in GOD and his son Jesus Christ. I grew up without much teaching about GOD, Jesus, etc. during much of my "younger years". At 7 years of age or so, I was grounded to my room as punishment for an event I at this day can't remember, but what I do remember is that as part of my being grounded I had lost all of my "house privileges" and was not allowed to watch TV., listen to the radio, or play with any toys. I was only allowed to read anything I wanted from the choice of books left in my room; the entire Encyclopedia Britannica Set, my schoolbooks, and a Bible someone had given me. Well, I began with the encyclopedia’s... of course I wasn't going to read my school books, I mean, I'm a kid and what kid likes to study? After a short time, I began getting bored with the encyclopedia. There is only so much raw knowledge one can comprehend without a little action and intrigue. The result? I read the Bible... all the way through I might add. It was full of action, romance, intrigue and short stories about kings and floods and the plight of a suffering people, which at the time I very much related to... I mean, I was suffering too, or so I thought. I read and read and read. It was awesome; I liked this "God" guy and even the "Jesus" character. I seemed to somehow able to connect with them, and weird as it may sound, I actually took them on as what I thought to be at the time, my "imaginary friends".

One day when I was about 13 or so... and of course in trouble again, I remember sitting in my room, bored; by this time I had read most of the Encyclopedia during my numerous "groundings". I sat by my window and began talking to my "imaginary friends". I could see them, or so I felt, as I stared up at the sun. I had developed a personal relationship with them. I felt I could hear their voices and I knew they could hear mine. I remember asking them why it felt as though they were so real, and I remember them telling me it was because they were. Now, many would say the following was a part of disillusionment or my eyes playing tricks on me, but as I stared directly up, looking into the sun, I thought for sure I saw them or at least their silhouettes sitting there, comfortable, as if sitting under a great tree, just carrying on a conversation with me. It was and has always been a comfortable, warm memory, especially in times of difficult circumstance.

When I was 14, I came home from school one day to find we were having company for dinner. After much asking my step-mom finally told me we were going to have some missionaries over and they were going to teach us about God and their church. By this time I had had some encounters with "religion" and knew it was not a "thing" for me. Everyone I knew by that time that professed of "having a relationship with GOD and Christ, had been much as a zealous zealot professing in things I felt they neither understood nor lived by. Many were quick to judge me and cast their opinions about me in a very hypocritical and arrogant manner. I had no desire to neither meet these "missionaries" nor hear their message. As we sat that evening, listening to them and their message, I noticed the name tag one of them wore; "Elder Bond, Missionary, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints". It was the last part that caught my attention. I had seen the advertisements on TV. and come to enjoy the message they introduced. I quickly was overcome with a desire to learn as much as I could about them, their church, and their beliefs about GOD, Christ and these friends of mine whom I had come to know as only imaginary friends. In a short time I came to find that they embraced many of the beliefs as I had. They seemed to be able to explain to me, answers to questions I had, and they seemed to know of God in an intimate way, just as I did. It was not long (well 6 months... my dad required allot more "proof") before my whole family was baptized into the Latter-day Saint faith (aka. Mormon). I read the Book of Mormon in its entirety, and felt comfortable that it was a true testament of Christ by a people in a land other than that in which he dwelt during his time here on earth. But, by the time I was 16-17, I began to see a much dimmer side of the church that I was not so comfortable with. While I felt very secure and studied the scriptures with diligence, gleaning all that I could from them, I also began to see the ugliness of many of the members of the church. The casting of judgment, the feeling of absolute impossible pressures to be perfect, the constant comparison members exerted upon one another and others outside the church, in an attempt to puff themselves up and make themselves feel content within their individual imperfections, began to weigh heavily on me. I had issues with the fact that so much attention was placed on the Book of Mormon itself and on the Doctrine of Covenants, rather than an equal and balanced focus on the Bible and New Testament. By the time I had reached mid 18 or so, I found myself drifting away, and ultimately distancing myself not just from the church but my "imaginary friends" as well.

This continued till I was about 26 or so, with a few attempts to try again, but never with a great comfort or success. Then, when I was 26, I became determined to find this GOD, and talk to him. I had to know if he truly existed or not. Due to a sequence of events in my life, I found myself in West Yellowstone, Montana, where I ended up spending a year on vacation, investing great amounts of time just pondering, and reaching out to those "friends" I had once known. I came to find out a great many things that are now important elements of who I am today. I felt I came to understand more greatly and realize that my "imaginary friends" were not imaginary, they were real, and they were with me always. My faith in them began to build but my distance with church and "religion" became more distant as well, as I came to find that people were becoming more and more judgmental, trying to point out other's mistakes and misunderstandings of GOD and his divine purpose, rather than to focus on their own. I began to realize that GOD had given man ultimately 1 commandment by which not just I should follow, but by which he also followed and that explained all that he hoped to teach man. My purpose on earth was not so much to worry about the "here after" or what’s, why's and where's of this life; rather it was simply to learn to LOVE. The rest would explain itself in its due time.

Now, many would contend with me on this, as many have, but I point out one simple scripture, and give the explanation I received regarding it. Before I do, let me explain something as well; I consider myself not a prophet, a "spiritual leader" nor a "governing light of the masses". I am like you, a simple person, sharing my thoughts and understandings, nothing more. If you feel your life, your understanding, your purpose entails more than the following, than fine so be it; that is between you and your relationship with "The Big Guy". This is my purpose, my understanding, and this blog is about my relationship with the "Big Guy" and his son.

Mat 22:35 Then one of them, which was a lawyer, asked him a question, tempting him, and saying, Mat 22:36 Master, which is the great commandment in the law? Mat 22:37 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. Mat 22:38 This is the first and great commandment. Mat 22:39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. Mat 22:40 On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.

This passage from the King James Version, but known and found in all versions, is quite simple. I mean how could GOD make it clearer? And yet, there are still people all over trying to justify their lives, their religion, their beliefs, and yet ignoring this passage almost entirely. No where in the Bible, does Jesus say, you have to be a Mormon to go to heaven, you have to be a Jew to go to heaven, you have to be a Southern Baptist, once a Methodist, but now a practicing Protestant, to go to heaven. Nope, he just says follow him… and when asked which of the commandments he gave for entering the kingdom of heaven is the most important, he simply said… all are important, but learning to love all things and all persons, just as I have loved, that is the most important thing. I guess the confusing part comes in that GOD told them to love their neighbor as they love themselves. Somehow our society has managed to corrupt us into not loving ourselves.

Well, I’ve ranted on here, for enough space… I will continue this I’m sure in a short time… but for now enjoy, love, and be loved. Don’t sit there and try to judge others by your understanding, but rather, understand that your understanding may be in complete contradiction to that of someone else. It is up to you to practice LOVE, and to attempt to understand them and help them see the light of Christ and his LOVE through your patience and understanding. When we allow ourselves to become so self serving and prideful in our beliefs that we are quick to discredit the beliefs and understandings of others, we close the door on all that Christ taught and we deny ourselves and others of the gifts and blessings of a life filled with joy, peace, and LOVE.